Wow, I completely forgot about this blog. I'm more inconsistent that a Michael Bay Movie! (Hey-ooo) As I look through my previous posts (There are two) I can't help but notice how little I've matured over the... months? I don't know how long it's been since my previous post. But hey, better late than never, right? Right? Eh nevermind. In this day and age I am exposed to many things, most of them irrelevant and forgettable, but one sticks in my mind, like white on rice, or Christopher Nolan to epic soundtracks. This issue is none other than... girls. As my developing goatee becomes more prominent on my chin, my psyche is exposed to the allure of the female gender. This is the very thing that makes me a (straight) man. I strategize ways to earn the affection of the lady-species, ways to make myself more attractive in their (oftentimes judging) eyes. But while this is in my mind, my greater sense of Denny-ness kicks in and says to me, "You want to save money right? Than stay away from girls! They'll eat up your money like they eat up-"
"Quiet!" The other person in my mind replies, "This man-child is in progress of serious thought, he is trying to better himself!"
The two people in my mind bicker and bicker until finally I have to drop some Earl Grey and flush them out. Sometime I wonder if I need psychiatric help. The two entities in my mind remind me of the types of girls I've encountered in my traveling of this realm of existence. In my bestiary, I have cataloged these types of ladies
The Attention Seeker Swarm- Like a Mexican seeking something to jump (I'm half Latino I can say that), these ladies seek attention. Should you ever run into one, play it safe and pay them what they desire, but not for prolonged times. If your timing is ever so slightly off, prepare for something incredibly horrible. Bringing money should protect you, and if you ever need to defend yourself, throw it at them.
La Locas- Fun to be around, oftentimes random and spontaneous, are fierce friends, usually have a mix of sarcasm and random humor. Don't let them anywhere near sugar. Dear God, please don't let them have sugar.
The Drama-tick- These girls are like the Attention Seeker Swarm, only to a worse degree. Like leeches of of a Stephen King movie, these girls revel in being the center of attention. They have only two ends of a spectrum, only two speeds, full and stop. The slightest offense will set them ablaze, the smallest insult will set them a-tears. They usually laugh the loudest, talk the loudest, make their business the loudest, and if they know something you don't, they'll loudly tell you how they CAN'T tell you. Like a with in the L4D series, if you hear their wail, stay far far away.
The Friendly- These girls are incredibly rare, oftentimes caring friends and loyal buddies. These girls are usually infused with the slightest amount of the aforementioned traits, but to a more tolerable level.
The Silent- They don't say much, usually because they're plotting some evil plot or planning some evil plan. Be cautious when making contact, they could easily be Friendlies in disguise, or just as easily be some horrible witch.
These are not absolutes, you may find traces of slutty, flirty, funny, psycho, stoic, and psychic scattered among them. These are just some broad explanations of girls I have run into in my exploits.
I would love to ramble on but all this typing and thinking is making my brain hurt.
Con Muchisimo Amore
-Denny II
